Your Children Will Notice



Modeling good behav­ior is a sig­nif­i­cant vari­able when rais­ing chil­dren and per­haps the most dif­fi­cult to do con­sciously. We all have pat­terns of behav­ior that we would pre­fer NOT pass­ing down to our kids. I per­son­ally can rat­tle off a hun­dred but I’ll spare you.
So we do what we can, when we can. Right?
Here is an exam­ple of a dad who could have taught his child a valu­able les­son but chose to ignore the oppor­tu­nity:

I was stand­ing with my grand­son on a crowded NYC train. We were in front of two teen girls who were clearly not sick or tired as they gig­gled and danced in their seats while tak­ing self­ies. The dad of one of the girls stood next to me. They all noticed the lit­tle boy. How could you not? Poor kid was barely able to hold the sub­way bar and grandma had to repeat­edly remind him while explain­ing why it was so impor­tant.
I was really sur­prised by their lack of com­pas­sion and self absorp­tion but more sur­prised and dis­ap­pointed by the dad for not inter­ven­ing. He missed the chance to be a role model.

What you do at these mini moments will have last­ing effects. They build on each other. I encour­age us all, and espe­cially par­ents, to demon­strate kind­ness and respect when­ever pos­si­ble. Your chil­dren will notice.


All For Your Family

new book

All For Your Family

The fol­low­ing arti­cle in Huffington Post high­lights 26 things good par­ents should not do to avoid screw­ing up their kids. Today’s par­ents tend to dote, con­trol and live through their chil­dren. I just hap­pen to have a new book, hot off the press, which explains how par­ents can make these changes and why it is so impor­tant. It makes a per­fect present for new and not so new par­ents. I think you will all love the cover 🙂 

All For Your Family, by Sharon Youngman

Available on Amazon


Why Say Yes To Parent Education



As an edu­ca­tor and a mom, I know for a fact that par­ent­ing help is hard to request. Though par­ents may com­plain and say they need help they often do not truly think they can change any­thing. They acknowl­edge their pat­terns of behav­ior may not be the best, but it can always be worse, and in the end they remain stuck in their cur­rent sit­u­a­tion. Yet every­one will tell you that being a par­ent is one of the hard­est and most impor­tant jobs any­one will ever do. This illog­i­cal atti­tude about par­ent edu­ca­tion is sim­ply not accept­able. No par­ent believes they are per­fect yet par­ents typ­i­cally behave as if no assis­tance is required or even pos­si­ble.

Television, radio and online adver­tis­ing intrigue us with promises of mir­a­cle inter­ven­tions. Parents who are strug­gling may pay good money for var­i­ous pro­grams aimed at refo­cus­ing par­ent­ing approaches. Some will actu­ally work. Bookstores are filled with books that spout the­ory and pro­vide insight but lack prac­ti­cal solu­tions. 

My prac­tice serves local fam­i­lies. Through work­shops and indi­vid­ual ses­sions I help par­ents make big changes for their fam­i­lies. My nine big ideas are prac­ti­cal and pro­vide the foun­da­tion for par­ents to employ sim­ple strate­gies that can be mod­i­fied for indi­vid­ual par­ent­ing styles and val­ues.

  1. Have a plan for dis­ci­pline
  2. Be united with your spouse
  3. Choose com­pro­mise over con­trol
  4. Encourage respon­si­bil­ity by doing less for your child
  5. Use check­lists to sup­port inde­pen­dence
  6. Think about when it makes sense to step back from inter­fer­ing with nat­ural con­se­quences
  7. When cre­at­ing con­se­quences try to be cre­ative to give the impres­sion that the con­se­quences are not par­ent cre­ated but merely the result of the sit­u­a­tion
  8. Use active lis­ten­ing to enhance com­mu­ni­ca­tion
  9. Truly accept and appre­ci­ate your child by set­ting aside your own ego

I encour­age every fam­ily to take time to ele­vate their par­ent­ing skills. You have noth­ing to lose and so much to gain. Parent edu­ca­tion is a must.  Whether you see a pri­vate coach, attend a work­shop or par­tic­i­pate in a par­ent sup­port group, find some­thing that fits your style.  Hopefully all fam­i­lies will one day embrace par­ent edu­ca­tion.

If this makes sense to you, learn more about my phi­los­o­phy, strate­gies and ser­vices.